Bedlam Bards Limerick Page

Featuring limericks about
the Bedlam Bards and BedHeads

There once were two bards at a faire
Who sported both black and white hair
In our ears kept ringing
Their infernal singing
So we wished that they were not there
T. O'Daly

(This was the first bard-related limerick actually written while we were singing. We're a little miffed that the fan decided to write about the Brobdingnagian Bards instead of us.)

There was a fine balladeer name of Hawke
Two pennywhistles he kept in his sock
An innocent young maid
He took into the shade
And oh, how that cradle did rock
Carol

Lilly, sweet singer so rare
Combined with a cute derriere
Your singing's sublime
An angel with rhyme
But it's your peaks we all want to share
Carol

Our Cedric fine music does play
'till the lassies just all melt away
They tip him with dollars
Tucked in corsets and collars
But there's another way they'd like to pay
Carol

The handsome High Sheriff of Argyll
Has such an arresting smile
Then, with the ladies in cuffs
He'd tickle their muffs
While tapping his stick on the tile
Tom

(Tom was our police escort at Hawkwood, and he actually is the Chief of Police in Argyll, Texas. He's the only cop I've ever seen with a hand-made wooden mug hanging next to his gun and hand-cuffs.)

The fiddler makes all the girls glow
Broken-hearted whene'er they must go
His affection is true
And it is all for you
At least until the next show

We drink to the bards of Bedlam
And the nut house that they escaped from
Or perhaps out on a leave
A good behavior reprieve
No, there is not a psychiatrist that dumb

The burden of being a Bard (Bedlam Bard)
Girls line up by the yard
To hear a few ditties
Offer cash off plump titties
The life of a Bard is so hard

Hawke's gap tooth grin may be cute
But, it shows off a wanton pursuit
Some people say
It was time or decay
It was too much forbidden fruit
Denine

There was a young lady from Clare
Who went running through the cactus quite bare
One misstep in the sand
On her chest she did land
She got up with a prickly pair
Denine

There was a young lad from Muggery
Who wanted to learn skullduggery
Alas his employ
Became cabin boy
And he only got lessons in buggery
Denine

Here's a Limerick of the Day site:
http://pagebuild.com/limerick/index.htm

This site has a lengthy technical analysis of how to write a good limerick: http://www.sfu.ca/~finley/discussion.html

Here's the index of the limerick analyzer's site, with links to many other
limerick sites:
http://www.sfu.ca/~finley/index.htm

The Alien Limerick Generator (this is weird):
http://www.herald.co.uk/~mel/limerick.html

Limerick contest site:
http://www.webcom.com/~erique/limerick/limerick.html